June 24, 2012
Dear Future Children,
Your father is amazing. He gives me a voice when I don’t have my own or don’t know how to use my own. He gives me encouragement when I need it most. Today marks the day when I will no longer live in fear of failure. Your father brought me here – to a place of acceptance no matter what. He’s inspired me to pursue my passions: dance and writing and who knows what else… we’ll see where this journey takes me. I want to make him proud of me. I want to make you children proud of me. I want to be able to model what I expect of you, and I don’t want you to live in fear – like I have for years.
You are accepted no matter what because you are a child of God. Not only that, but you are a child of two amazing parents who love you very much. So, thank you for being a part of this journey with me. I haven’t met you yet – I haven’t held you in my arms or heard your first baby cry – but I KNOW you’re mine so I want to share this journey with you… I’m 27 years old. A newlywed – just 2 months into married life with your dad, and I’m beginning something new – I’m beginning a life of purpose.
My time on Earth is meant to glorify God, and I want to do that to the best of my ability. Not that my 27 years leading up to this day have meant nothing, but those days were lived with fear and the heavy desire of approval from others. I can’t live my life that way. And I don’t want you to live your life that way so I will take up my cross today and follow Christ in this journey of pursuing the giftings He’s given to me. I’m a little bit scared because I want to succeed yet I dread the cost at which it may take to succeed. But your dad already told me that if I just try than I’ve already succeeded and that he will be proud of me no matter what IF I try. So here it goes, this is me trying… 😉